THE JOKE THREAD
#33
The itallians and pollocks decided to have a football game to see who was the most intelligent.
At halftime the game was tied 14 to 14 but when the pollocks heard the buzzer to end the half they thought the game was over and went home.
Two plays later the itallians scored a touchdown and won
At halftime the game was tied 14 to 14 but when the pollocks heard the buzzer to end the half they thought the game was over and went home.
Two plays later the itallians scored a touchdown and won
#34
What would it be like to nail jello to a wall? You'd have to be awfully fast.
How does teflon stick to pans if nothing sticks to teflon?
How do you know when yoghurt has gone bad?
How did the person who invented cottage cheese know they were done?
Why is there braille on drive up ATMs?
Why do they sterilize needles for leathal injections?
Are any of you grunteled employees?
Man who laugh while drinking soda is snorting coke.
Man who fart in church sit in his own pew.
Man who stuck in pantry has *** in jam
Nessesity is the mother of invention is a stupid proverb, Nessesity is the mother of futile dodges is closer to the truth.
TV: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
I didn't like the other forum but then I saw it under adverse conditions: My computer was on.
How does teflon stick to pans if nothing sticks to teflon?
How do you know when yoghurt has gone bad?
How did the person who invented cottage cheese know they were done?
Why is there braille on drive up ATMs?
Why do they sterilize needles for leathal injections?
Are any of you grunteled employees?
Man who laugh while drinking soda is snorting coke.
Man who fart in church sit in his own pew.
Man who stuck in pantry has *** in jam
Nessesity is the mother of invention is a stupid proverb, Nessesity is the mother of futile dodges is closer to the truth.
TV: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
I didn't like the other forum but then I saw it under adverse conditions: My computer was on.
#35
A little boy sees his mom get out of the bath, obviously sees her private area.
Later in the evening, he asks her: "mom, whats that between your legs?"
The mom says "thats where god gave me a little cut to make me different from boys"
To which the boy replies ( and you have to say this RIGHT after the mom says her line): "OUCH, GOT YOU RIGHT IN THE **** HUH?"
Later in the evening, he asks her: "mom, whats that between your legs?"
The mom says "thats where god gave me a little cut to make me different from boys"
To which the boy replies ( and you have to say this RIGHT after the mom says her line): "OUCH, GOT YOU RIGHT IN THE **** HUH?"
#36
-What does GAY stand for?
Got Aids Yet
-What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Megasoreass
-Which is better, being born black or gay?
Black...you don't have to tell your parents
How about some pick-up lines:
-If I was a squirrel, I would burry my nut in your hole
-(motion for girl to come here with one finger), "If I can make you come
with this finger, imagine what I could do with all five!"
-**** me if I'm wrong...but haven't we met before?
-So, do you want to see something really swell?
-Hi, do you want to have children?(assuming the answer is no) Ok then, can we just practice?
-Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
-Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me?!?! I thought you knew...
-Do you know the difference between my ***** and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!
-Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out....) Would you like to?
Got Aids Yet
-What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Megasoreass
-Which is better, being born black or gay?
Black...you don't have to tell your parents
How about some pick-up lines:
-If I was a squirrel, I would burry my nut in your hole
-(motion for girl to come here with one finger), "If I can make you come
with this finger, imagine what I could do with all five!"
-**** me if I'm wrong...but haven't we met before?
-So, do you want to see something really swell?
-Hi, do you want to have children?(assuming the answer is no) Ok then, can we just practice?
-Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
-Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me?!?! I thought you knew...
-Do you know the difference between my ***** and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!
-Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out....) Would you like to?
#38
Originally Posted by UniqueTII' date='Nov 22 2002, 10:13 AM
The best pickup line ever is: "I'm not the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you."
"I know you can't lick your own *****.... so how bout it?"